Friday, May 9, 2008

Its 8 pm SLT - Does your RL spouse know where you are?

I have had some very interesting experiences over the past almost year in SL. I have learned alot about myself. I have learned things about myself that I thought I knew - but not as well. I have been reminded of old friends and traits I loved and some I didn't.

SL amplifies who you are in RL. It amplifies the good, the bad and the ugly. If you prefer to see yourself as a victim... then SL turns up that volume. You can wallow to your heart's content. You can soak up feelings of little or no self-worth and look for validation by taking yourself down a highway to self-destruction. Is it what you would do in RL? Perhaps, perhaps unconsciously.. and perhaps over a slow, winding ride.

If you prefer to see yourself as someone who enjoys life, enjoys people, and hopes to learn all you can... then SL can amplify that too... over and over. It can open doors to new passions. It can open new doors to old friends - like music and dancing and good conversations. You may wonder why all that - if I find it so rewarding - isn't it in my RL? Well, my 4 small friends whom I love dearly dictate that. SL allows for me to enjoy those things, and enjoy them. Multitask and do homework. Dance and hoo and snuggle on the couch with them. Have conversations with people I would never necessarily meet in RL and grow as a person. Can I do that in RL? Sure - part of my career allows me to do that. But socially, rarely.. right now... RL needs me to be here - holding my little girl's hand and enjoying the Disney channel for the 100th time. Yes Hanna Montana can co-exist with Stone Temple Pilots blaring at the Glamshack or the Beehive :) Hoo!

So... at 8 pm SLT... does your spouse know where you are? Does he or she care enough to be online and exploring and enjoying what you also find so fun? Does he or she take the time to get to know your online friends and enjoy them as well? Or - do you keep your RL and SL so separate that the two will never meet? Do you choose to keep them separate and throw stones at those who allow themselves to be vulnerable and enjoy all SL has to offer? I know many from my time in SL who have moved into glass houses. They have been very brave stone throwers. Sadly, they don't realize the glass they are shattering with their stones are part of their own homes.

I dearly love my spouse for being a part of all the growing pains SL can bring. We are a good team. Those who make my SL so full are one's I would never hope to do without.

Move on? Sure. Grow and learn? Always. Keep an open heart and an open mind? But of course!

4 comments:

Mr B The Tech Teacher said...

You're so right about SL amplifying who you are, when I joined I barely spoke to anyone and spent my whole time playing with the scripting and modelling. In other words I am: a nerd!
Thank you for your lovely comment on my blog :)
~Shiv

Kimala said...

Shiv -
It is so nice to meet you in the blogosphere :) thank you for taking the time to come by. LOL you don't strike me as a nerd - can nerds write as well as you? (other than technical things of course)

Take care & Thanks again :)

Parker said...

Kimala, I too, am glad I found your blog. Your words have given to much reflection and inspiration this dreary Sunday morning. This blog has a message that I needed to hear in regards to a current issue in SL.

You are a very wise woman and I am glad to know you.

Kimala said...

oh Parker thank you :) I am so glad to know you too!! I'm just on this road trying to figure it all out as well :)