It's time to move it move it!

So... in my never-ending quest to redesign my blog... I have ventured out... into the big bad world...I have set out into the world of Word Press.

I imported everything... I'm still learning the ins and outs... but I would be most appreciative if you would update me in your blogroll to my new home at http://reslience.wordpress.com/.

Friday Finish Line

"Good friends are good for your health." ~ Irwin Sarason

Very ready for Friday. Thank you for hanging with me this week... I promise... I'll return to the regularily scheduled cheerful half-full Kimala starting...

NOW! :)

WOOT!

FINALLY! A light!

So... here... in the recesses of my email... I found this little gem I had to share with all of you today. If it isn't positive, then I don't know what is :) Hopefully it will help you all see that eventually I do dig myself out of my dark place and the trampolene and encouragement from everyone was really really appreciated.

See what you think:

Speaker and author, Jim Cathcart, says that to be at your best, find your zone of optimum velocity by observing the pace and intensity at which you perform best. This is the zone at which you are most creative, unstressed, happy and productive.

Above the zone: First you experience stress and frustration, then anxiety, and finally burnout. At this level you are overwhelming yourself with too much to accomplish at one time. Lighten up a bit to get back on track.

In the zone: You are at your best. Not stressed, going with the flow of work naturally, productive and self-assured, challenged but not overwhelmed, motivated and able to roll with problems.

Below the zone: First you experience boredom, then apathy, and finally depression. You feel useless and artificial; self-esteem suffers. Bite off more and take on a greater challenge to get back on track.

For me the key to managing my energy is exercise. It almost sounds too simple to be important, however, without exercise my energy levels and my attitude "take a hit."

Lastly, protecting and replenishing your emotional energy is critical for every leader. Mira Kirshenbaum, in her book The Emotional Energy Factor, offers a refreshing, down-to-earth approach:

"First, you plug the leaks: learn to recognize what drains your energy - life situations, toxic people, or habits such as worry, indecision or guilt. Second, you identify what fills your tank - pleasure, prayer, anticipation, or fun - and give yourself more."

~ Mac Anderson, Manage Your Energy

And if you have time... enjoy this little clip he offers on the Simple Truths website... (click here... it is worth the time!)

I want something else...

to get me through this...kinda life...



...wish we could get back there... from the place we used to start...

Ok... this tune is from 1997... does that make it old? 11 years? hmmmm it totally fits... the music picks you up... the lyrics remind you to search for something beyond... of course I pick and choose the portions of lyrics I want to remember since pieces totally don't apply. but hey... when you don't write your own tunes.. it is hard to be too picky, right?

I think the reason why my head is in this space these days is I'm grappling with the fact that once you choose a road in life - no matter how bumpy and hard and uphill it is... you have to just keep going... you can't turn around necessarily and there aren't always exits handy. Keep on, keeping on.

When you are one of the drivers on the car going up that hard road, you have to keep a poker face, and an attitude of it will be ok. Kids smell fear, they sense disappointment; they yearn for comfort, routine, structure, positive reinforcement and unconditional love. In a world that requires us to keep driving on that road, no matter how bumpy it is, at a faster and faster speed, on less and less support, sometimes it is hard to find the right route and the right reasons to make pit stops. Kids don't seem to come with users' manuals and parenting must rely so much on faith and intuition.

So... will our littlest keep his glasses on his face or in his backpack so we don't have to buy another pair? Will he work toward being good with the reward system we've put into place? Will our middle son continue on his path of becoming less stressed about school so that the anxiety attacks subside? Will our oldest focus to get all he needs to get done and continue his path of success in school despite the ADHD and learning disabilities challenges? And will our sweet baby girl not get lost in the shuffle?

I love second life but right now my real life has me on overload. Thank you in advance for understanding if I just zip in and out. It's Tuesday... so that's a good thing, right? Tomorrow is hump day... then we are on the downhill of the week. Keep on keeping on... in this semi-charmed kinda life.

So... on that note... I will step back from that ledge...

Commute Blogging with Alanis Morissette

That I would be good even if I did nothing
That I would be good even if I got the thumbs down
That I would be good if I got and stayed sick
That I would be good even if I gained ten pounds

That I would be fine even even if I went bankrupt
That I would be good if I lost my hair and my youth
That I would be great if I was no longer queen
That I would be grand if I was not all knowing

That I would be loved even when I numb myself
That I would be good even when I am overwhelmed
That I would be loved even when I was fuming
That I would be good even if I was clingy

That I would be good even if I lost sanity
That I would be good
Whether with or without you

Some Mondays are harder than others. Today is hard. I needed to post this so I could get it out of my system and start picturing bigger and better things. It is hard to not feel like you measure up. It is hard to feel like you chose a path in the road that was harder than everyone elses... and now there is no turning back.

Half full suggestions anyone?

Sunday Battle with the Blog!

Sigh...

Sunday evening... what a crazy bumpy rocky road my blog has had this weekend! I had the bug to create. I wanted it to be pretty. I wanted it to have 3 columns. I wanted it to feel arty...

So... Friday night I found this beautiful template and installed it. I was quite proud of myself (like that surprises you). However, it was missing a key portion of my header... the part that explains why I misspell resilience. I can't have a blog called reSLience and not have anywhere that explains it. So.. I set out to fight with the code. Mind you, I know HTML... enough to be dangerous (heehee). But.. XML? Oi!

Joonie offered to help. She asked if I saved what I used to have. Well I did... kinda... and um... no.. I normally don't read directions until they become a last resort. Sigh... So... as you can see the joke is on me.

4 templates later... here it is. I decided to go vanilla. Classic. Clean. Easy. Its Sunday night and I want my blog to at least function this week. But... you can BET I'm going to hit up our graphic designers and web guys tomorrow. LOL like we have a huge team or something. I'll ask the 2 :)

Sleep well. Dream of good blog templates with 3 columns for me. Let me know if you find any. Cheers to restful weekends and good things for all of us through this week!

Why no widget for blogger?

I love this! Just found this and am so excited about it (yes, I do get excited easily... must be something in my DNA.. and you... you get your mind out of the gutter!)

Team USA Soundtrack!

Late Night Discoveries

Sometimes some exploration is just what the doctor ordered. An amazing SL artist, Gwen Carillon, has a sim called Elements. I better not share the URL or it will become too crowded... kidding. Peaceful. Introspective. An incredible contrast of light, dark, water, earth.

I took the opportunity to load up my SL camera and snap away. I then promptly came home and decided to become an artist myself. I decided to do it for me though. It feels good. It soothes my soul. Not bad for an avatar, eh?

Book Smarts vs. Attitude and Elbow Grease

Ok... so... I am still trying to avoid Joonie's quiz marathon... but I am very very close to giving in. Instead, I decided to explore the blog links she offers on her sidebar. That Joonie is one popular girl! Aimee's blog sported this quiz. Yes, I shamelessly am posting my results... I never claimed to be the brightest bulb on the tree but darnit I am a hard worker with a good attitude (most of the time)...

One Report Down... One to Go... Inner Peace is close at hand!

Blogosphere distraction/intermission in work day :)

I have to share this... My imaginary friend, Blissie Boucher (aka. blissfulgypsywoman.blogspot.com), sent me this. She is on a RL vacation right now and I am missing her so I thought this would be the best thing to share in her honor. I KNOW some of you will LOVE this advice!

CALMNESS IN OUR LIVES

I am passing this on to you because it definitely works, and we could all use a little more calmness in our lives.

By following simple advice heard on the Dr. Phil show, you too can find inner peace. Dr Phil proclaimed, "The way to achieve inner peace is to finish all the things you have started and have never finished."

So, I looked around my house to see all the things I started and hadn't finished, and before leaving the house this morning, I finished off a bottle of Cabernet, a bottle of Bailey's Irish Cream, a bag of Mrs. Fields cookies, the remainder of my old Prozac prescription, the rest of the dulche de leche Cheesecake Factory cheesecake, the rest of a carton of Ben & Jerry's Cherry Garcia, and a box of See's chocolate chocolate chip truffles. You have no idea how fantastic I feel right now.

Pass this on to those whom you think might be in need of inner peace.
Inner Peace Anyone? Spread the word!

Suck It Up

It's FRIDAY! My butt is tired! It has been a lonnnnnnng week. 2nd week of school for Dave and the kids, real work week for me after being on vacation and then traveling for work... and now... I have major projects/reports/etc due today.

Am I procrastinating? But of course!

I'm sitting lower and more relaxed on the couch. I'm only half way through my 1st cup of coffee. I could easily just spend the morning blogging and then look at the clock and wonder where the time went. I am stalking Joonie through her blog and never ending quest for self-discovery through quizzes. I am carefully trying to side step the very strong urge to take some myself.

I have been thinking alot about The Secret again -as you can see from my silly Spongebob post below. I found a cool widget to put on my blog sidebar (like I need MORE). And... I really really believe the Law of Attraction is alive and well. I don't think it matters what religious background you are from or who you worship... what you think about and visualize and pray about... ultimately you bring about. So... with that in mind... I am going to picture me getting all my work nicely done let's say... before noon? LOL.. .ok no LOL. Seriously.

Off to slay the dragons of reports and tasks left undone that must be finished before 5 pm today.

If This Song Plays Over and Over...?

So... if this song plays over and over in my head... will it help? Does Spongebob somehow know the Secret and practice the Law of Attraction?

Not a bad plan for my week...

You've got to get up every morning with a smile on your face, and show the world all the love in your heart. Then people gonna treat you better; You're gonna find, yes, you will, that you're beautiful as you feel.
-- Carole King

I was worried on Friday when I looked at my schedule for next week (now TOMORROW) that I better just sleep at work. My colleague even offered to put cots in one of our downstairs training rooms for purposes of napping and then getting back up and starting to work again... kinda like what they do in hospitals for doctors.

THEN I thought a little further about my fab four and their 2nd week of school, and all that entailed... and um... honestly... I had a moment of panic! I have enjoyed my time off this summer with my kids more than other summers I think. Or... it is just that all that seems so long ago that I enjoyed it just as much, I just can't remember?

I love the look on their faces when they ask if I will be here when they get home from school and I can say yes. I love the look on their faces when they ask if it is a "stay home day" aka the weekend... and the answer is yes. Sunday mornings are my favorite too. Nobody cares about staying in pajamas. Nobody feels the need to eat breakfast quick and run out the door. The first trip of the morning ends up being one to get donuts :)

If I think about the whole week all together - every piece - work, kids, money, commute, bills... you will hear a scream to encompass the globe. So... I try to follow Carole King's advice... keep a smile on my face... and just focus on the next thing at hand. For now, that next thing is just enjoying the moment that is Sunday morning. We have a Bedrock party tonight on SL. Blissie promises to be home today for a Sunday field trip. I have helped D figure out facebook. We have tried to curb Simon's endless 5 year old requests with sugar and tickles. Rachel is off playing the newest online fascination Barbie.com. Life is good... despite the fact it is August and over 105... life is good :)

One other note... saddened by Bernie Mac's untimely death... I thought this was a clip worth sharing. He had the right idea too - do what makes you happy... and most importantly choose to be happy!


and... if choosing to be happy isn't enough... choose to be tough and take a page out of Bernie's book... from the Bernie Mac Show:

Ever Wonder?

Ever wonder what I do for work? I get in on the behind the scenes... sneak peek... cool stuff... coming our way for educators, kids, families... from PBS. The end of my DC trip included this highlight...

Should I admit I am the same age as Sesame Street? Yes... something making me a kindered spirit bound to love PBS I guess...



Show a little love to PBS :) they do good things!!

Unbelievable!

My family recorded the opening ceremonies of the 2008 Olympics because I was just enroute home when it was happening. I got home in time to watch all the teams enter the stadium - but not see the tremendous performances. Watching it this morning, I am in awe. I know some of the history, some of the politics, and some of the philosophy. I know enough to know I shouldn't endorse their politics. I know of the controversy of the trip the olympic flame across the world. But... in watching the tremendous opening ceremonies - the dance, the symbolism, the beauty, the synchronicity of the performance, the technology behind what they created, the ultimate awe factor... how can you NOT be impressed!

Ok... I admit it... I was a band geek. I did marching band. It is hard. You are responsible for your one little spot and yet if you screw up your one little spot - it has a domino effect across the entire performance. That was in a band of 175 members... and we were good... we won awards... but.. 2008 performers... 2008 performers in sync... it is mind boggling. It is beauty and science. 15,000 performers total.

If you missed the opening ceremonies... go back and catch them on NBC.com. Regardless of your politics... take the time to absorb the performance art and beauty that encompasses this once in a lifetime event. The symbols above represent harmony. There is a very cool site I found that you can explore other chinese symbols China Connection. The other thing I find fascinating is the symbolism of numbers. I learned yesterday that 8 is the luckiest of all in chinese culture. 080808 represented a reason for thousands of chinese couples to get married yesterday. 6 and 9 are also lucky numbers. 4 and 14 are unlucky. 14 the unluckiest of all... representing certain death. There are no 14th floors in high rise buildings in China.

So... where is the olympic presence in SL? I am going to set out today to find it. I would love for someone to recreate the mural painting dance on the floor of the Bistro. It was incredible. The drumming... yes, I love drummers... but the mass 2008 drummers and the technology lighting up the countdown? Mind boggling precision. I hope there is something the Lindens have cooked up to honor the olympics in SL. I hope there is something someone has done in some sim. If not... I'm going to feel a little pressure to do I don't know what.

Cheers to harmony and foreign lands and things beyond our wildest imaginations made possible!

Hotel Internet, Blogs, and Other Random Hotel Thoughts

Traveling for work. Dare I say that I only fly coach when I fly for work? LOL! 5 hour flights across the country cause your thinking to be fuzzy regarding personal details. It also means you are guaranteed a movie in flight. Should I admit that is often the only time I get to see an adult movie? NO you perverts... not an "adult movie" just a movie that really only adults would want to see. Rarely do they show Disney or animated movies in flight :) So... we watched "What Happens in Vegas". Great flick!! Dennis Miller plays the part of a judge that sentences a couple to staying married after a drunken ceremony in Vegas. Great lines. Great reflections on being married. The laugh out loud kinda movie ;) gotta love watching that on a plane sitting beside people who don't know you ;)

Ok... so... Should I say I also refuse to travel unless I stay in a Westin? Wow! I love fancy schmancy hotels. Westins? MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM Heavenly beds, heavenly showers, great smelling soaps, shower gels, and plasma HD television. If I could get free broadband, I would live here. I could join the likes of all those characters I love on soap operas who live in hotels. But... drawbacks? My family... I miss them. The internet? It works to blog and do email but not Second Life. The food? I miss eating food I can just grab from the kitchen. Silly, I know... but true.

So... I'm stranded... all tucked into bed. Decent hour.. only a little after 7 my time. EST is late... after 10 and I should be snoozing if I knew what was good for me. Anywhooo I decided I would peek in on blogs. Slim pickings. You people... what did you all gear up to write about the Joonie - Bigd saga and then just check out? Get on it!! I count on you people!! I have yet to check Bradley and Joonie's blogs tonight. I'm holding out - I'm keeping the faith - and saving them for last. I just KNOW they'll have some good reading material. I know you all are whooping it up at Glamshack.. not even giving me a second thought :(

So... I'll return to watching TV. I still can't figure out the EST schedule. Why the heck is everything on an hour later here? Very lame! Why must they do that? Letterman is then on much much too late for me. I love Letterman.

Tomorrow... I am headed home to make things right again in my world. I'll be able to hug my kids and husband tightly and be thankful for a safe trip home (even though it won't be until evening). I'll be able to enjoy the luxury of broadband and SL. I'll be able to enjoy the snuggles of my little ones that insist on sleeping in my bed (not a heavenly bed according to label but definitely according to love :) ). I will be expecting ALL of you to have updated your blogs for my reading pleasure. Since I can read them on my Blackberry - I might just do so at the airport. Be forewarned - that means you have until 3 pm EST to post :) woot! (yes, sadly, the former English teacher in me is rearing her ugly head).

In my next life I think I'll live in a big city, in a high rise, and only rely on public transportation. But... for now... I'm ready to return to my every day life and all those sweet faces that make each and every day worth it... even when I feel like it might make me lose my hair. Cheers to homecomings and things that make you appreciate what you have! Woot!

Nail Biting and Other Things the Night Before School Starts

I took a long nap this afternoon. I have had a never ending series of headaches this week. Physically. Some emotionally too I suppose. As I woke up, I was taken back to 6 years ago when I was required to stay in bed. I spent 6 weeks in bed 6 years ago. I was very pregnant with twins and it was the best way I could rely on keeping them safe from premature birth in the final weeks of my pregnancy.

During that time, I read. I read ALOT. I didn't read fiction. Having taught English for many years before I was a bit burned out on fictional reads. I soaked up parenting books. I consumed as much as I could about twins. I was still amazed that I could be carrying twins and even more fascinated by what it would mean for our future as a family. I had been so incredibly desperate to have one more baby. I wanted a girl. But, more than wanting a girl, I wanted just one more. I wasn't ready to say no more kids... just yet. Well, you must be careful for what you wish for. Simon and Rachel were my answered prayers.

Each day of those final 6 weeks was a challenge. I was incredibly uncomfortable. Super excited. Beyond scared of what delivery day and beyond would bring. I had a fantastic doctor that I wouldn't trade for the world. We had a fantastic support system of family and friends. Honestly, I think we ate better in those final 6 weeks than we have our whole marriage, up until this day! Wow! Gotta love those good friends who felt the need to cook for us. MMmmmmmmm. But I digress.

During those final pre-twin era days in our lives, I spent a lot of time with our then youngest, Noah. Noah was a fantastic foot massager and belly rubber (still is in the foot department btw). Noah was 5 at the time and finishing up preschool. He was and is our family politician. He and I talked a lot about how someday, he would be the one to take the twins to school on their first day of kindergarten. He loved every idea of being a big brother and loved the fact that he would get to take on that challenge of teaching them the ropes he didn't even know yet. That's our Noah. He jumps into the unknown with both feet. He might freak a little in the process but he jumps anyway.

So... all those years later... here we are. When I take it all in day to day in my mind, rewinding, I am in awe of the fact we made it. Man... nobody could ever know how many diaper changes, how many bottles, how many firsts we would experience with these two little souls that would feel like incredible hurdles because despite the fact we were raising two others and had been through all those stages and phases of babies and toddlers... having double trouble made it all new. We survived paying for a wonderful babysitter who we love to this day (yea lizz!!) and we survived Simon's freak out goodbyes at preschools - both years, and we survived paying for preschool (barely).

Tomorrow, I will take them to the busstop. Noah, Simon and Rachel all with their backpacks and lunchboxes. They are going to ride the bus from day one. They are all ready to go to their own classrooms. They are going to experience... we are all going to experience that day Noah and I had thought through in such detail years before from that safe place in my bed. Zach is off to his 2nd year of middle school. He always does amazing things and walks into each new year appearing fearless. I'm going to take a lesson from him tomorrow and send my youngest 3 off with that same fearless excitement.

End of an era. Start of a new one. Sigh. Deep breaths. Internal half full half full mantra will be in full swing. Blessings on each of them.

it's the heart that really matters in the end

Like I needed any more reasons to love Rob Thomas... sigh... and... like I needed any more reasons to like what PBS does... we stayed up late last night to enjoy a series I had only heard about but never taken the time to watch... Soundstage. The reason was none other than one of my very favorites - Matchbox 20 - was the focus. Every minute was worth it. Every minute was also commercial free :) Austin City Limits that followed was also pretty good. My guess is some of my snobby music friends (YES you KNOW who you are) would enjoy both shows. Take a quick peek at the website and you'll see what you missed.

Then... if you haven't seen Meet the Robinsons yet, take the time to snuggle up with a little one and watch it. A super touching movie... with... em em... a fantastic soundtrack... featuring none other than... (can you guess?) Rob Thomas! Woot!

let it go,
let it roll right off your shoulder
don't you know
the hardest part is over
let it in,
let your clarity define you
in the end
we will only just remember how it feels

our lives are made
in these small hours
these little wonders,
these twists & turns of fate
time falls away,
but these small hours,
these small hours still remain

let it slide,
let your troubles fall behind you
let it shine
until you feel it all around you
and i don't mind
if it's me you need to turn to
we'll get by,
it's the heart that really matters in the end

our lives are made
in these small hours
these little wonders,
these twists & turns of fate
time falls away,
but these small hours,
these small hours still remain

all of my regret
will wash away some how
but i can not forget
the way i feel right now

in these small hours
these little wonders
these twists & turns of fate
these twists & turns of fate
time falls away but these small hours
these small hours, still remain,
still remain
these little wonders
these twists & turns of fate
time falls away
but these small hours
these little wonders still remain

Oh yeah... and one other thing... this same show? The PBS Show, Soundstage? It also hosted John Mayer way back when.. with special guest Buddy Guy. I can't think of ANYONE I know who likes those two ;) WOOT!

Silly Blogs... kinda like... onions?

Pounding headache. No... I don't drink very much... hardly ever actually... I just have the symptoms of one who does I guess. This headache in the back of my head, the back of my neck, traveling across my shoulders and up to my forehead won't go away. Swimming in the amount of water I'm trying to consume, carefully remembering to have some coffee so I won't exaggerate it by lack of caffeine, I try ice packs too. That seems to help. Relpac.. 1 of those. Those are scarce though so I try not to take those very often. I am hopeful my headache will burn off as the day progresses like fog does over the ocean side cities in California by mid-day.

When I first thought about what I was going to post today - I was going to do the Parker, Joonie, Blissie patented Popsicle and weather surveys. I love those! I can't wait to try them. But as I scrolled down and down and down, and realized how many blog posts I was behind on (heck, even Crighton had a blogette from yesterday!!!), I realized how behind I was. These silly blogs are just incredible. Second Life led me to blogging. Before that, I always figured blogs were too too personal and I didn't really have anything worth saying anyone would read anyway. Then, I began to see how they are really like an asynchronous conversation. They are a way for getting to know someone better. They are good for a laugh - sometimes right out loud - a good hard laugh. They are good for a cry. Sometimes you people share things that just make my eyes start to leak. Blogs... they are a heck of a lot like onions! Each layer is a bit different... thick, thin... sometimes making you cry when you slice and dice... tasting a bit different if you saute them or just eat them raw on something. They add a flavor to my life now that I do not want to imagine living without.

They are an incredible creative outlet, as is SL. They compliment SL. They have allowed me the privilege to get those I now care about so much, in more depth. They allow us to carry on the conversation after we log off from our adventures in our pixelated landscape. They validate our experiences in-world and remind us how human we all our and how diverse our lifestyles are across the country, and across the world. It makes me love all of you, and SL even more in so many ways.

Silly blogs. There are all kinds of purposes for them. I stumbled across one yesterday that simply offered HTML coding tricks for widgets and such. I stumbled upon another that was only about technical assistance for something or another. Then, I stumble back into all of ours. Our family, our network, our crazy clique... whatever you want to call it... I get lost in your entries. I realize how much I've missed if I don't check in every day. I am sad when blogs go days without new posts because I know things must be hectic or stressful or the creative juices must have dried up just a bit for that person.

So cheers. Toasts to each of you. Toasts to blogettes, to laundry lists of survey results, to interactive polls, to amazing photography, to crazy tales, and deep insightful analysis (bradley :) ). You make my life richer. You connect me to a creative adult part of my brain that just doesn't get that kind of stimulation from dogpiles and cartoons and sibling fights I constantly referee. Happy weekend everyone!

Universe... who'd have thought!

I stumbled upon this today when reading Joonie's blog and exploring the horoscope link. Her horoscope is always so detailed I thought I should see what it offered me. While it was interesting... I found an excerpt at the bottom of the webpage even more valuable... You be the judge.

Somewhere in the world is a tree that has been struck by lightning in such a way that the scorch marks show your initials. Find that tree.

Somewhere in this world, there is a treasure that has no value to anyone but you, and a secret that is meaningless to everyone except you, and a frontier that possesses a revelation only you know how to exploit. Go in search of those things.

Somewhere in this world, there is a person who could ask you the precise question you need to hear in order to catalyze the next phase of your evolution. Do what's necessary to run into that person.
*
The preceding oracle comes from the book, PRONOIA Is the Antidote for Paranoia: How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings.

Talk about a mantra for half full and resilience. If you are not out there searching now - get off your butt and head on out that door to begin. Carpe Diem. Move it Move it. Andele Andele! Woot! Seems like we have been given everything we need. It just means we have to do a little bit of work to find it. Ok ok... I'm getting up off the couch... maybe a little Colorful Quiet first :) just to get me going. Thank you CQ Bravin!